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September 2006

 

September 30, 2006

I should stop now and touch nothing else. I should have known better after yesterday ...

Posted at 11:36 PM

 

September 29, 2006

Well there it is - that's the kind of shitty day I've come to know and expect. I knew that the last few days must have been a fluke ...

Posted at 11:28 PM

 

September 28, 2006

Busy busy. I'm still finding myself inspired enough to get things done, and I've been running all sorts of errands and taking care of all sorts of tasks. It's amazing after nearly a year of this depression-inspired malaise that's haunted me that I'm finding myself inspired to do anything, but now, even though I don't feel any happier per se, I do feel more interested in doing things, and I'm actually following through.

I took my mom and grandma to lunch at Applebee's for lunch, ran a few small errands including my "repair and replace" agenda I've decided upon (which basically repairs or replaces all of the things of mine that are in some screwed up shape (okay, it's quite a project, I'll admit)). I took my grandma to get her hair styled, and I took us all to the grocery for a bunch of stuff. I set up a few appointments for myself for next week to get things done (including more in the "repair and replace" agenda. So it's mostly just been a bunch of boring stuff that has needed to be done but isn't worth detailing to you here in this Journal - the point is that I'm getting things done, and that's quite a good thing. Boring, domestic, and time-consuming, I know, but a good thing.

Posted at 8:56 PM

 

September 27, 2006

It's been a freakishly crazy day for me with coordinating everything and running around and taking care of one thing after another, but it all came off well as far as my grandma saw of everything, and that was the whole point of course. As I mentioned in yesterday's Journal entry, today is my grandma's 92nd birthday. She was happy from early in the morning (when she got a fruit basket delivered) to the end of the day (when my mom took her (and me) out to dinner at Friday's. In between were a lot of cards, a lot of friends, a lot of presents, and a whole bunch of surprises. She was indeed very happy throughout the whole day.

My presents went over well, the purse getting pretty rave reviews all around. The big surprise was that my grandma was so pleased with the cable upgrade. She's not good with change, but she loves being able to watch Turner Classic Movies (TCM) now, and she likes a few of the other new, additional channels. And she could tell, as could I, that the digital quality in the color and clarity of the images was much better than through the previous analog system, and that pleased her. That improved quality alone, honestly, almost justifies the extra expense.

So it was a good day. I'm tired and worn out, but things went well, and I helped make someone very happy. If I could do that every day I'd be a bundle of joy, but I just don't get these chances much anymore. This was a nice rarity, though, and I'll sleep well tonight.

Posted at 11:07 PM

 

September 26, 2006

No wonder Bush can't find Osama bin Laden; he can't even find out where some tainted U.S. spinach came from after two full weeks.

Posted at 10:52 PM

 

September 25, 2006

My planned trip to Toledo for today didn't go quite as planned. Oh, I made it to Toledo, and I accomplished the most important thing I wanted to do (taking my desperately broken electric razor to the Appliance and Shaver Shop for repairs), but there were so many complications and 'things that just came up' from the moment I woke up that I didn't even get out of the car at the Shaver Shop until nearly 4:30 PM, and the few things I'd wanted to do in Toledo today just didn't look so possible anymore. There just wasn't enough time.

I did manage to get in touch with Steve, and his work schedule worked out such that he and I could have dinner and chat for a while, so the trip was at least worth my while. Steve and I even stopped at Mark's house before we headed to dinner, visiting with Mark's wife Tiffany and with Mark's kids (Mark was out coaching football, as he does every day but Sunday during the Fall).

So I had a nice time, and I did get the razor in for repairs, but I'm disappointed that I didn't get to explore the new Glass Pavilion at the Toledo Museum of Art, or even tour through the Museum itself since I haven't been there in a while. I didn't get to go to Cars at the second-run movie theatre, either, which is a shame because the $2 price tag was actually in my budget. But I'll have to go back Friday to retrieve my razor, so maybe I can do the other things I want then. That would be nice, doing those things and more, and perhaps I'd be less rushed and thereby more relaxed. That, too, would make for quite a nice, well-needed trip.

Posted Written at 12:09 AM

 

September 24, 2006

I had quite an engaging time with the guys today. They're all a bunch of characters, and they just kill me with their antics. Mark particularly is such a riot with the way he charges into situations and strikes home with a joke or a pretend wrestling hold. Steffen's kids really enjoy Mark's wackiness, and Mark is clearly at ease with kids (which comes as no surprise since he has five of his own). Strangely enough, Steve has been joining in more as well, not just with biting words or caustic wit but with sparring with Mark or joking with Steffen's wife Melissa. Steffen himself seems to sit back and watch everybody else more than I would have expected from him, but he's clearly not the kind of guy to sit on the sidelines either, and it's no surprise when he jumps into the fray and makes his point clear. Steffen could be an imposing figure if he wanted, and I know he sometimes puts that to use, but when we're all together he's just one of the guys, part of a team, ready to talk or help out in any way he can.

And that's just how those guys are, and that's why I keep going back. It's a lot of fun for all of us, and we gain an experience that's more valuable than gold each time we meet up. You can't find that sort of thing on any map or in any book - it's just one of those things you should appreciate and revel in. It's great stuff.

Posted Written at 12:18 AM

 

September 23, 2006

After quite a few hours rearranging, organizing, and updating files on my computer over the last week, and after most of today and a good chunk of yesterday, my computer is completely backed up for the first time in a year ... or at least it's pretty close.

I still have some smaller things that I want to do that will finish my double-back-up system, and I want to make some new CD sleeves for the jewel cases for my archival DVD system, but none of that is anything hugely complicated or significant or time-consuming, and I should make short work of those things on Tuesday. Even without those things done, though, I have an excellent backup done and I'm ready for when (or if, but I think it is inevitable that) my Powerbook has a complete video failure problem rather than just these annoying pixel-wide vertical lines. Heck, I may even take it in for repairs before it completely gives out on me. Wouldn't that be shocking?

So Tuesday I'll finish the odds and ends, and I'll get to work on cleaning up some details in my iTunes library before going to work at adding the remaining CDs from my collection into the full iTunes library so that I have everything included. I may even try a hinky kind of set-up that I'm hoping will allow me to record mp3s from my stereo so that I can put some rare records and cassettes into my iTunes library as well. All of that's down the road, though. For right now I'll settle for finishing the backup.

Tomorrow I'll be visiting with Steve, Mark, and Steffen in Perrysburg, and on Monday I plan to head out to Toledo after running errands here in Sandusky during the morning. My electric razor is seriously fucked up, and I'm hoping that the Appliance and Shaver Shop in Toledo can repair it. They've helped me once before with this razor, about three years ago, and I'm hoping they can help again. It's much more fucked now than it was then, so I'm not so sure it's reparable, but considering it would cost $200 to replace the system, I'm not liking the idea of hearing that it's beyond repair.

For now, I'm very tired, my eyes sunken and drilling into my head from staring at computer screens closely all day. I'm overly tired, and sleep sounds wonderful. Hopefully it'll come easily.

Posted at 12:14 AM

 

September 22, 2006

Today was a day full of errands, buying of presents (my grandma's 92nd birthday is next week), arranging a number of things by phone, continuing the backing up of my computer, and also continuing the seemingly neverending tragic epic of the Powerbook Saga (which is yet to be explained in this Journal, but which will be fully revealed when if it ever is completed). With so many things going on it was no wonder that it has been a tiring, confusing, and hectic day, but the number of completely unexpected and confounding problems that cropped up during the day were not remotely icing on the cake (they weren't even frosting on the cupcake). Somehow or other, with working on things until after 11 PM, I managed to complete all but one of the specific major goals I had for the day. Sadly there are still some loose ends on smaller issues, and there are problems that still need resolving regarding, but overall it was a successful day. As pleased as I am with the accomplishments, and as much as I enjoyed the season finales of Stargate: SG-1 and Stargate: Atlantis, the various problems and complications of the day have left me quite exhausted. With more energy I might have written more, in fact, detailing either more of what all I did today or giving my critique of two fine episodes of my favorite shows. Since I have next to no energy left, though, I'm going to give up on such lofty goals and simply go to bed. Hopefully there won't be any complications in doing that.

Posted Written at 11:47 PM

 

September 21, 2006

Between my grandmother and my mother I have little trouble maintaining my migraine. Lucky me. I had my grandma well prepared for all that we needed to do today, having laid things out for her multiple times over the past three days. For anyone else it wouldn't have been a big day - an appointment at the hairdressers followed by a stop at the bank and lastly a visit to the hospital to have some blood drawn for lab work. For my grandma this is a big deal, however, because: 1) she moves slowly at all times, 2) invariably gets ready with such timing as to be running 10-15 minutes late, regardless of what time of day the appointment is for, and 3) she has a bad habit of eating next to nothing for lunch when she has afternoon appointments, such that she is tired and weak by 4 PM, and if you are out and about after 4 PM then she is completely tired, weak, and flighty. So to avoid all of that I made simple but direct plans, had my grandma fully in agreement (which is a big deal in itself), and had things set such that she would be able to still be ready to go without rushing and set for an afternoon of appointments with plenty of food and coffee to give her the energy to get by.

And then she talked to my mother last night and threw all of that away because my mother - who has no idea what is going on up here - told her that she couldn't eat or take any pills before going to have the blood drawn. And of course my grandma waited until well into the morning before telling me any of this, meaning that she didn't eat or take any pills until well after 10:30 AM, she had no lunch, and she was not only tired later in the day but confused and upset pretty much all of the day since I had to have her call the hospital for confirmation that she didn't have to worry about food or medicine before this particular blood test. I had of course told her that already, but she never believes a word I say anymore (which is some weird aspect of old age and dementia that is incredibly frustrating), and the only hope was for her to get the word directly from the hospital. Even then it was a crapshoot - sometimes, even with a doctor's word or some other undeniable verification of the way things are supposed to be, she still argues that she's sure things are some other way.

So what should have been a simple, relaxed day for me and for her was not at all simple and about as far from relaxing as could be. Thanks, mom, you bitch. How do you always manage to do this sort of thing?

Posted Written at 12:06 AM

 

September 20, 2006

I saw a Walking Stick today for the first time in at least twenty years. Even more surprising is that I saw it right in the yard here, not out in a more wild, forested area. That's the thing, too. I haven't seen a lot of many various kinds of interesting insects since I was a kid, partly because I've lived more in city areas without a back yard that leads up to a forest. Heck, I even lived on a wooded estate, and I spent years walking various trails (and off of the proper trails as well) through a number of large wooded Metroparks in Akron and Toledo. Surely some of the reason I'm not seeing the more unusual insects is because of the city, and a large part is due to urban pesticide programs (which are really supposed to just be to curb mosquito populations), but I'd also say that climate change has played an effect.

This year, where temperatures have been mild all Spring and Summer (except for the very first week of summer, which even in the mid-90's was still mild compared to average high temperatures around here), I've seen all sorts of unusual insects. I've seen four different Monarch butterflies in our sage bush over the course of the summer after having seen no Monarchs for a few years (and scientific studies have shown that Monarch populations have risen notably this year after many years of repeated declining populations). I even saw a sizable adult grasshopper a couple of weeks ago, the first adult grasshopper I've seen for a dozen years and the first of any kind of grasshopper I've seen for a number of years (crickets are another matter, however, they're all over the place now and always).

So where am I going with this? Hell if I know ... I just thought it was cool that I saw a Walking Stick, and I tend to have geeky moments like that. Is that so bad?

Posted at 11:27 PM

 

September 19, 2006

Avast, ye scurvy naves! 'Tis the day er reconin' once agin, dontcha know? Set sail, me hardies!

Posted at 12:31 AM

 

September 18, 2006

I spent the day today updating all of my files, important documents, web browser bookmarks, address book files, and all that sort of thing today - the first time I've done that sort of stuff in a while. For something so simple it's amazing how fucking long it takes to go through all of that shit. Damn! It took me the whole day!

I want to update some other stuff, too, specifically my iTunes library (where a few things need to be tweaked but where I also want to add a bunch more CDs to the library), but I think that the system-wide back-up I've been doing all of this prep work for must come first. I'm worried that my video card is going to die on me, seeing as the single-pixel vertical line that has been on my screen for a few weeks now added a second line not long after that (although a bit to the right of the first), then a third line came up a couple of days ago (much farther to the right), and today a fourth line has been flickering in and out (which is new - they usually just start and then they're there permanently). So my worry is that things are only going to get worse, and it seems as though it's taking less and less time for new lines to show up, so sometime I may have so many "off" pixel lines that I just can't see to do anything. I'd rather have everything well backed up before I have to send my Powerbook in for repairs, particularly when I don't know for sure what's wrong or what will happen during repairs.

So hopefully I'll have a back-up done by the end of the week, around other things. That's the plan. I have no idea how I'm supposed to afford sending my computer in for repairs, but it's looking more and more like I'm going to have absolutely no choice if I want to have a usable computer at all. Does that suck or what?

So wish me luck, folks. I could always use some of the good stuff (no offense, but I have all the bad luck I need, so keep that kind of luck to yourselves).

Posted at 10:07 PM

 

September 17, 2006

I made my way out to Perrysburg for some time with Mark, Steve, and Steffen. We got together a little later today than last week (2 PM rather than 11 AM), and that made a big difference in how awake we were. We had a great time, including some splendid Chinese food, and broke up just after 8 PM, when Steffen had to head to work. A six hour get-together was a little on the short side as far as how things generally go for us, but we still got to eat, talk, joke, and relax - I don't feel like I missed out on anything.

Posted at 12:18 AM

 

September 16, 2006

<...whimper...>

Posted at 9:56 PM

 

September 15, 2006

Kill. Me. Now.

Posted at 11:28 PM

 

September 14, 2006

Today was full of various frustrations, but I just finished watching The Last Boy scout on TV, and that made up for a whole lot of my shitty day. That's always been one of my all-time favorite movies, fitting perfectly with my sense of humor and my cynical look at the world. If you've never seen it then treat yourself - you won't be disappointed (rent it, though - they screw it up a lot on TV with the cut-out scenes and the voice-overs).

Posted at 12:34 AM

 

September 13, 2006

I am profoundly lonely today.

Posted at 11:29 PM

 

September 12, 2006

I think I may be sick. I'm certainly more tired than makes any sense, and my headaches have been worse, and my stomach has been uncomfortable, and I've been warm, and ... well ... what the hell else could this be? It's sure as hell no from falling in love (more's the pity).

Oh well. Nothin' to do but live with it and hope I feel better tomorrow.

Posted at 10:35 PM

 

September 11, 2006

It's amazing. With each year that passes, Bush and the Republicans use the 9/11 tragedies more and more for political gain. If FDR had used Pearl Harbor for political gain in a similar fashion, the American people would have never let him get away with it. Why the Republicans are given a free pass on this boggles the mind. I can only hope that enough people come to their sense and realize how sick and disrespectful Bush and the Republicans are being and have been by being so opportunistic and insensitive.

Posted at 11:21 PM

 

September 10, 2006

After more than six weeks since our last get-together, Steve, Steffen, Mark and I met at Steffen's house today to catch up, joke around, and relax. It was long over due.

We had planned to meet at 11 AM, a bit early for my tastes considering that I had to get up at 7:30 AM to shave and shower before checking on my grandma and then making the drive to Perrysburg - but I was okay with the whole deal because I had definitely missed the guys, and I certainly needed a break from my grandma. Of course I should have known that when I got there just a couple of minutes before eleven, nobody else had arrived yet other than Steffen, and of course he was there because it was his house. So Stefan and I chatted for a while before calling Mark and Steve. Mark had still been sleeping, having worked third shift last night but having insisted that we get together at 11 AM so that we could spend a full day together. Go figure. Steve, as usual, was late because he'd waited until the last minute to get something copied, something he wanted to bring with him (I never found out what), and he had been "unexpectedly" delayed. I don't know how unexpected it can be when he's always delayed when he does this last minute copy thing.

So anyhow, just before Noon we were all assembled, and we ordered lots of food (pizza, subs, etc.) and talked about what had been going on since we last saw each other. We talked and played around until 8 PM, in fact, when Steffen had to leave for work, and then we adjourned to the driveway out by our cars to talk some more, Steve and Mark and I for another half hour and then just Steve and I until about 10:45 PM. Steve has taken vacation time for all of next week, so we could probably have ended up talking even longer, but I decided to get us going, knowing that I still had a good drive ahead of me.

I got back a little after Midnight. My grandma was still awake, but she seemed sort of out of it, and asked me a few times "Where I'd been" which didn't make a whole lot of sense to me since I had told her earlier that morning, as she ate her breakfast, where I was going and who I was meeting, and I had told her the same info the night before. And of course she never called me on my cell phone at all, so I don't understand what was going on. I had a hard time telling if she couldn't remember what I had told her or if she couldn't understand why I was getting back at about Midnight, but considering I always get back from visiting the guys at around Midnight or, more often, even later, I couldn't understand what she meant.

It concerns me, because if she can't remember me telling her that I'm leaving for part of the day and she subsequently gets upset about my absence since she can't remember where I am, then that means that my only option would be to stay with her always, never leaving town or even the house unless I've got her with me, and while I suppose I must eventually face that that, too, will be inescapable eventually, it's not something I look forward to facing so soon. Hell, I need a break from her, and it's hard enough to coordinate meeting with the guys as it is now. And what about finishing my thesis? How can I do that if I can't leave for Bowling Green for the better past of a day now and then to speak with my thesis advisor? It's just all very ugly, really, and I don't look forward to any of it. It's all coming at me fast, though, and my grandma's unlikely to get any better as time passes, only worse.

All of this has made me exceptionally tired, so I need to sleep. I'll deal with this m0ore tomorrow, I guess. I can't do anything else now anyhow.

Posted Written at 2:13 AM

 

September 9, 2006

I hate everything, damnit. Why is everything shit?

Posted at 10:28 PM

 

September 8, 2006

There is no justice - not in regards to anything.

Posted at 11:34 PM

 

September 7, 2006

Turtle-squirts, you say? Feh!

Posted at 10:51 PM

 

September 6, 2006

Fundamentalist Conservatives = Far Right

Fascists = Far Right

... therefore ...

Fundamentalist Conservatives = Fascists

Sounds right to me.

Posted at 11:05 PM

 

September 5, 2006

Today would have been Freddie Mercury's 60th birthday, and even though fifteen years have passed since his death from AIDS, I still feel the grief as if it were still fresh.

Freddie Mercury and Queen have had an incomparable impact upon my life through their music, many times throughout the past and still into the present. It leaves me speechless to consider how much more Freddie could have accomplished in these past fifteen years had he lived, and while I do not any longer cry for hours at a time when I remember that he has died, I still feel that deep pain and sense of loss. A great mentor - a great consoler and philosopher to myself and millions more has been sorely missed for fifteen years, and his memory will not fade any time soon.

Happy 60th birthday, Freddie, wherever you are. I miss you and love you, and I can't say thank you strongly enough to convey my feelings. You will not be forgotten.

Posted at 12:40 AM

 

September 4, 2006

The insanity that is Ohio continues ...

A major committee of the Ohio Legislature has voted to push a new law that would track and force public registry of anyone in Ohio who is even remotely accused of any sex offense at all. The accused wouldn't even have to be charged with any crime, let alone face trial, and yet they would be placed on public listings as sex offenders and would have to register with police wherever they moved, and where they moved would be limited by the laws limiting where sex offenders can live.

I have always opposed the sex offender registries, the ones for convicted sex offenders, because for one reason, they continue to punish an offender after they serve their time in prison/jail/etc., something which I feel violates the Constitutional guarantee of freedom from cruel and unusual punishment (and if they are deemed such a threat then the sentences should be increased but still have a clear end of time served available), but I also oppose such registries because they are simply pointless. The number of repeat sex offenders is not a significant percentage of those convicted, and statistics show that the greatest threat to children for sex offenses are people who are close to them such as family members, friends, or neighbors. On the adult side, yes serial rapists do exist, but treating those people the same as some kid who gets drunk and goes out of control (which I'm not excusing) - it's just not a balanced comparison.

This law, if passed, would be a great way to destroy your enemies. Just send in an anonymous tip to the police, noting your enemy's name, address, and 'alleged crime', and they'll be screwed for life. Is that simple or what?They'll have trouble getting or keeping jobs and they'll have truly horrible difficulties in finding places to live, and regardless of the fact that they never did anything, they'll forever be branded and fucked over for life. Only Republicans could come up with a law like this ...

And strangely many Ohio politicians repeatedly express total consternation as to why people are leaving the state in record numbers and why they have nothing positive to say about the state which in many cases was the place of their birth and the home of their families for generations. It's stupid shit like this where even the most upstanding citizen can be fucked over for life simply because of living in Ohio. Who would want to stay where the government at every level is corrupt, where jobs are impossible to find and easy to lose, where the colleges are rated near the bottom of any in the states yet the college tuition rates are at the highest in the country for state schools, and where extremists have radically taken over the law-making bodies in the state and are creating laws that make it dangerous to even breathe?

Plan Gains to Publicly Identify Accused
Ohio panel backs registry proposal

COLUMBUS - An Ohio legislative panel yesterday rubber-stamped an unprecedented process that would allow sex offenders to be publicly identified and tracked even if they've never been charged with a crime.

No one in attendance voiced opposition to rules submitted by Attorney General Jim Petro's office to the Joint Committee on Agency Rule Review, consisting of members of the Ohio House and Senate.

The committee's decision not to interfere with the rules puts Ohio in a position to become the first state to test a "civil registry."

The concept was offered by Roman Catholic bishops as an alternative to opening a one-time window for the filing of civil lawsuits alleging child sexual abuse that occurred as long as 35 years ago.

A recently enacted law allows county prosecutors, the state attorney general, or, as a last resort, alleged victims to ask judges to civilly declare someone to be a sex offender even when there has been no criminal verdict or successful lawsuit.

The rules spell out how the untried process would work. It would largely treat a person placed on the civil registry the same way a convicted sex offender is treated under Ohio's so-called Megan's Law.

The person's name, address, and photograph would be placed on a new Internet database and the person would be subjected to the same registration and community notification requirements and restrictions on where he could live.

A civilly declared offender, however, could petition the court to have the person's name removed from the new list after six years if there have been no new problems and the judge believes the person is unlikely to abuse again.

The attorney general's office said it continues to hold discussions with a group representing day care operators about one of the rules pertaining to what such facilities would do with information they might receive pertaining to someone on the registry if that person is living nearby.

Posted at 11:31 PM

 

September 3, 2006

<Yawn>

I've spent a lazy day playing Neverwinter Nights: Infinite Dungeons today, and now I'm strangely tired. Who'd have guessed that sitting in a comfy chair and snacking all day would make you tired?

Posted at 12:00 AM

 

September 2, 2006

Why is it that Labor Day weekend is always the worst three days of abysmal TV programming?

Posted Written at 12:47 AM

 

September 1, 2006

Will George Bush be assassinated in Chicago in 2007? Hmmm... Well, we can dream, can't we?

Posted Written at 1:03 AM

 


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Journal, by Paul Cales, © September 2006