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July 2014


bullet July 31, 2014

Feh I say.

Posted at 6:28 AM


bullet July 30, 2014

Still in hell.

Posted at 6:46 AM


bullet July 29, 2014

Not pickles; definitely not pickles.

Posted at 7:20 AM


bullet July 28, 2014

How is it that with the hours at work cut back I not only earn less money (less hours = less money) and have way too much to do at work in the short few hours on the clock each day, but I also don't seem to have enough time to even do what I was doing before in my 'off' time (let alone do other additional things since I should have a full three more hours each weekday? It boggles the mind. It's like being in an episode of the Twilight Zone. Time moves faster now than ever before, and I have no idea how to keep up.

Posted at 6:21 AM


bullet July 27, 2014


Posted at 6:31 AM


bullet July 26, 2014

Yes ... you're right ... it could be worse ... it could be raining ...


Posted at 7:38 AM


bullet July 25, 2014

This day cannot possibly end quickly enough.

Posted at 7:40 AM


bullet July 24, 2014

The stress just keeps building and building, one thing after another, rarely with any decrease. There are laws of physics that show that situations like this end unpleasantly, and I'm feeling like that may well apply here.

Posted at 6:26 AM


bullet July 23, 2014

Am I doomed to have this horrible curse of delayed, returned, lost, or damaged mail/packages now for the rest of my life? Now I find that packages I didn't even know were coming are getting screwed up and complicating an already complicated life. Wah!

Posted at 6:36 AM


bullet July 22, 2014

Well, I should have known it was all going too smoothly ...

Posted at 7:44 AM


bullet July 21, 2014

Brunch at Bob Evan's was nice (my first omelet in a couple years or more) and it didn't take me 2-3 hours or more like it always does every other time I've gone to Bob Evans. We went from there to the Toledo Zoo and had a very pleasant time. I hadn't been to the zoo in quite a number of years, and while I recognized much, there was a great deal of change in exhibits - almost all for the better. I'll probably be stiff and severely sunburned tomorrow, but it will have been worth some suffering, I suppose.

My mom took me to Cinco de Mayo, a mexican/american restaurant that is literally in front of my apartment building but which I've never gone to. I had been told it was the best option in the local area for Mexican, and it's true - it was a good meal.

After a little more talk I left my mom at her hotel to pack and get ready to head back to Florida this morning. For me today means work and all of the headaches that come with th8at (possibly more than that considering all I need to get done today). This weekend turned out better than I'd feared, but it's still back to a week of hell starting today, so there it is.

Posted at 6:25 AM


bullet July 20, 2014

Went to the Toledo Museum of Art yesterday with my mom and as usual loved and remembered all of the permanent exhibit pieces, but this time I marveled at how many new pieces were on display in every category. It was a real treat.

Mom treated me to lunch at Red Robin and then we walked around window-shopping in the few Shops at Fallen Timbers before we went to see the movie Jersey Boys. My mom had wanted to see this since my dad refused to go with her, and while it wouldn't have been a movie I chose myself, it was good, and the singing was spot-on. We had dinner at a loud but tasty brew pub in Fallen Timbers and then headed back to the other side of Toledo and her hotel room and my apartment. Tomorrow is planned as a brunch and then a day at the zoo, and hopefully it won't get too hot and roast us while we take in the animals. We'll see

So far this has been a better visit than I had expected, and we're half way through.

Posted at 6:59 AM

bullet July 19, 2014

My mom arrived in town yesterday. We talked and had dinner at the decent Chinese Buffet nearby. Today is a planned trip to the Toledo Museum of Art, a walk around the Fallen Timbers Shopping Center, a movie (Jersey Boys), and dinner somewhere. We'll see how that plays out as - while there should be time to do all of those things - it may be a bit ambitious to think everything will come together smoothly (since that almost never happens for me).

Posted at 7:44 AM


bullet July 18, 2014

Another week dies with a whimper.

Posted at 6:46 AM


bullet July 17, 2014

Hey! Let's go back to work again today so that I can get another mind-splitting, blinding migraine! Yea! Who's next in line for the pain train, huh? Anyone? Huh? You know you wanna ...

Posted at 6:50 AM


bullet July 16, 2014

Instant migraine.

Isn't work fun? Another day like yesterday and I'll have no trouble committing suicide.

Posted at 6:48 AM


bullet July 15, 2014

Get out of my head, work stuff!!! My time away from you is my own !!!

Posted at 7:03 AM


bullet July 14, 2014


Posted at 7:04 AM


bullet July 13, 2014

It took a lot of time to clean yesterday - even a bit longer than it took me to push myself out of my indolence and into the starting the cleaning in the first place despite my great antipathy toward doing so.

So now it is done. I'll admit I am pleased to have everything clean and sparkly and smooth and sanitary ... but I still dislike having to do it.

The cleaning took much longer than I had hoped, so I lost most of the day to all of it. I had hoped to do more with other things, but like everything else that's going on in my life the past month or so, I find myself stuck with fewer hours to do what needs to be done and as a result a whole lot less gets done. It seems simple looking at it objectively like that, but it is no less frustrating to feel that any progress is achieved at less than a snail's pace.

This is more of life and its sad pointlessness, struggling to get anything done at all with no reward, with no point and only after far longer than makes any sense to have worked at it. Yea.

Posted at 6:37 AM


bullet July 12, 2014

You'd think with my only cleaning my apartment every two or three months that I wouldn't feel so bad considering most people clean every week or two ... but I hate it. I love the results and would love to have it sparkly and clean and bright and clean all of the time, but I just don't have the desire to dust and scrub and polish. It doesn't look so bad since my OCD means I clean and put away dishes as I use them , all laundry is either clean or in the laundry basket, and everything is in its proper place, but the dust and dirt and scum and mildew and grime all builds up and up and up until it's just too much ... and even then I still have to aggressively force myself to clean.

Posted at 6:53 AM


bullet July 11, 2014

So tired. Again. Will I ever feel fully rested ever again?

Posted at 6:18 AM


bullet July 10, 2014

These shorter work days are too short. Yes, they fly by quickly, but they also make it impossible to get any significant amount of work done. It's driving me crazy (and the smaller amount of pay, though not terribly reduced, isn't any great shakes either).

Posted at 6:42 AM


bullet July 9, 2014

My good work ethic in the world today means that I do the work of multiple people for little pay and with no benefits, the shadow of potential unemployment always around the corner, and a complete lack of respect for the job I'm doing. I'd be better off mentally and emotionally if I was just a slacker or o kiss-up or a do-just-enough-to-get-by kind of guy. But still, I can't let myself do less, even when there's every reason not to.

Posted at 6:33 AM


bullet July 8, 2014

It's a nice summer day (Translation: It's way too fucking hot and humid for me, so turn up the A/C before I melt).

Posted at 6:23 AM


bullet July 7, 2014

It's a sad world after all; it's a sad world after all; it's a sad world after all; it's a sad world after all.

Maybe that wouldn't work as a song or a theme-ride at DIsney World, but it would be closer to the truth than the original.

Posted at 6:41 AM


bullet July 6, 2014

Back pain and migraines, making me miserable since forever. This news brought to you by nothing, since nobody would give me anything as a sponsor.

Posted at 7:10 AM


bullet July 5, 2014

I should be cleaning ...

Posted at 6:11 AM


bullet July 4, 2014

I don't work today, and while I'm sure my family will immediately see that and jump to the completely wrong and wrong-headed conclusion that that means I am now out of work, it simply means it's the Fourth of July and the office is closed to observe a national holiday. But, of course, reality and facts and sanity mean nothing when you're already perceived from the get-go as bad and wrong and anything negative that can be thought.

Posted at 6:56 AM


bullet July 3, 2014

Thinking if Ken a lot today. I miss him so ...

Posted at 6:42 AM


bullet July 2, 2014

More of the same (which, of course, means less of everything else).

Posted at 6:39 AM


bullet July 1, 2014

The days are getting shorter and I'm getting nothing done.

Posted at 6:20 AM


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Journal, by Paul Cales, © July 2014